He hears crows cawing outside his apartment.
He wonders what all that noise is about.
Do they just like to make a racket, or are they
discussing things like crow politics or the weather?
He being a little nuts gets an idea. He tapes the
caws of the crows and for weeks practices the
caws until he feels proficient in crow cawing.

The next time the crows appear in the trees
outside his apartment and begin their caws,
he steps out of his apartment and begins
cawing back at them. But he doesn’t get the
results he thought he would. The crows caw
louder and begin attacking him. He runs into
his apartment and the crows beat their wings
against his apartment windows for at least ten
minutes and, finally, fly away cawing madly.

He calls his veterinarian girlfriend and tells her
what happened. She says to him, “You have to
be careful with crow speak. If you caw wrong,
it sounds like you are swearing at the crows.
Thereafter he never tried to caw at the crows,
or even step out of his apartment when he
heard them cawing in the trees.

Bob Boyd